March 14th 2015, Paris, France
To tell you the truth, “Dora the Explorer” was never an accurate depiction of my life. Then again, if it were, it would have garnered a completely different audience. One of the writers was a close friend of mine. But he co-wrote a children’s show, not my personal tale of all that is weird and twisted in this world… and all the other worlds, while we’re at it. That Dora is better off, with her little monkey friend, her talking backpack, and her arch-enemy, a fox. She’s lucky.
I’m not that Dora. The only thing my friend kept from yours truly, the original, was the name and the haircut. I don’t go exploring the corners of this world. I don’t strap on my cool leather boots, I don’t follow a map, and I certainly don’t get to come back with totems and souvenirs from all the marvelous places that I’ve been to.
In fact, I never come back. I’ve been away from my own world for five years now, since it first started. You see, like I said, I don’t travel — not literally. I just fall through the bendy strips of time and space. I bounce from one parallel universe to another, with no control or knowledge of what I’m doing. It’s like slipping through the cracks, desperately trying to hold on to something concrete, yet failing miserably every damn time.
Today is the 137th time that I have pierced that veil, that energy sheet between universes, and the 137th time that I have cursed at my own existence, my inability to control whatever this is that I’m doing.
I still don’t have a reasonable explanation for my “condition”, and I’ve spoken to so many people — sometimes the same people, but not the same. I have met Dr. Morgan Farron about thirty times now. So far, his theories, though slightly varied from one world to another, are the least far-fetched.
I have only met him 30 times because he’s only made it alive in 30 of the 137 Universes that I’ve accidentally slipped into. In some, he died an infant. In others, let’s just say he made the wrong turn at Albuquerque.
Farron is a good guy, and every time we meet, he goes through the same process with me: denial, doubt, curiosity and finally acknowledgment of my condition, after I take him to meet my version from that particular Universe. It took me a while to learn it’s best…